Updated: Dec 22, 2021
Have you ever just floated on the water?
Laid back on the surface? Let it hold you? Support you?
The more you relax, the easier it is.
This feels counterintuitive.
Especially to Tryers and Strivers.
People Pleasers, Carers, Goodie Goodies, Squares.
They tend to intellectualise things rather than feel them.
Think about things. Analyse them.
Not let them be.
I did this.
Until I had a baby.
Then everything changed.
I was so exhausted. I had no defences.
The flood gates opened, and the tears came – 30 years of them.
Then they got packed away again and I carried on some more.
Until the next storm. The Dam bust open.
Not so long this time. But still it soaked my world for months.
Then the next, and the next.
The pattern of Worry to Anxiety to Low Self-Esteem to Depression in a seemingly never-ending loop.
I stopped fighting it. Swimming against the tide was exhausting me further.
Once I accepted it and worked with the emotions, the loop got bigger.
The gaps got bigger.
The episodes became shorter.
I started seeing it as temporary episodes rather than MY WHOLE LIFE.
The storms still come sometimes.
The waves still lap the shores.
I still recognize the tides when they start to change.
When old patterns threaten to sweep me under.
When I get busy with work, have some late nights, stop eating so well, miss a few days of meditation.
The strength of the water pushing. I know I’ve left it too late by that point.
I must listen and allow. Go with the tide.
I don’t feel scared anymore though.
I know it goes out again.
I know I can surf as I wait and watch my emotions wash over me.
It will pass, the heaviness doesn’t ever crash down as hard these days.
There is sunshine on the horizon and a gentle breeze, even on the choppy days.
I never feel as though I will be swept away by the mere force of the waves and never be seen again.
I KNOW I’m coming back and that this is just a trip I take to an old friend to say ‘hi’ and get some perspective, to reset every-so-often.
I don’t need to fear it anymore.
Acceptance is freedom.
Take back control by letting go.
That’s how life can be. I never would have thought it.
Striving too hard can actually cause you to drown.
Slow down, float a while.
It can save your life.
Namaste If you resonate with this and would like help to ditch worry, frustration, and guilt, and feel like a Good Enough Mum, then come join us in
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